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Sunday, January 26, 2014

Young Celebrate Older Adults Through Dance (Research, Video)


Some young people don’t seem to have a clue that older adults are the major reasons they enjoy many of life's pleasures. If they really appreciated the sacrifices that were made for them by previous generations, not just in their families, but society in general, perhaps they would understand that many of these older adults are entitled to far more respect than they are receiving from them.

I have witnessed outstanding young students displaying great kindness toward older people on many occasions. But I have also viewed lots of young people on the Internet in so-called funny videos mimicking older people in the most insensitive ways. Stereotypes were used in the extreme with language and graphics defying human decency. In addition, some young adults are guilty of mistreating older adults in terms of crime, service, and general courtesy. In a study published in Research on Aging where older adults were asked if they received worse service and if people treated them with less respect and courtesy because they were older, one in three said they felt they were treated worse because of their age.

Recently, I discovered this amazing video with young dancers celebrating the love and vibrancy of older aging. Keone and Mariel Madrid, dance choreographers who are a young married couple, perform a routine as an older couple to Bob Marley's "Is This Love?” Like the song says, older adults just want to be loved and treated right.  Who doesn’t?




Frances Shani Parker, Author
Becoming Dead Right: A Hospice Volunteer in Urban Nursing Homes is available in paperback and e-book editions in America and other countries at online and offline booksellers.

Saturday, January 18, 2014

Funny Hospice Caregiving Stories



Look at this face. If you think hospice patients and their caregivers are never this happy, you don’t know jack about hospice care. Whenever I tell people I’m a hospice volunteer, they usually respond with strong empathy for the difficult and sad work I must be doing. They also imply that I'm close to sainthood for accepting such depressing assignments. This always amuses me because I don’t find hospice volunteering difficult or sad. In fact, most days are pretty upbeat with challenges that are usually interesting. True service is always win-win. I’m a regular person doing what millions of people do in their own ways, and that is volunteer service.

Humor has a lot do with the kinds of interactions my patients and I share. People say I'm funny, but my terminally ill patients are often funnier, not only with me, but with others with whom they have contact. A very engaging patient shared many hilarious stories about her life. Some days she’d just reminisce and have us both cracking up, especially when she talked about the bear chasing her in circles around her house in a rural area. A male patient and his three roommates teased one another so much, it was unlimited laughter every time I visited them at the nursing home. My hospice patient who could barely speak was the ringleader. Oh, I can’t forget the two ladies having a pretend fight from their wheelchairs. I still haven't figured out who won, but it was more entertaining than “Saturday Night Live.” Another patient’s bedside birthday party with a menu of fried chicken livers, red velvet cake, and ice cream was another winner! Of course, one birthday balloon read, “It’s a boy!” What? Did my ninety-year-old hospice patient just have a baby?

These are just a few of hundreds of funny hospice stories that make me grin. If you have been a hospice caregiver, you have probably accumulated many stories of your own. Humor has health outcomes that can benefit everyone, including those who are terminally ill and their caregivers. Healthcare workers and patients should cherish these moments of laughter. Made you smile, didn’t they?
Frances Shani Parker, Author
Becoming Dead Right: A Hospice Volunteer in Urban Nursing Homes is available in paperback and e-book editions in America and other countries at online and offline booksellers.

Sunday, January 12, 2014

Frances Shani Parker: Detroit Free Press End-of-Life Article


On matters of life and death, making decisions now will help loved ones in the future. Recently, I was interviewed with others by Detroit Free Press staff writer Patricia Montemurri. The resulting news article with photos by photographer Eric Seals highlights the importance of end-of-life conversations, decision options, and documentation.

Among other comments, I emphasize the trouble people will spare loved ones left behind after they die if wishes are prepared in advance. Read the Detroit Free Press article for well-rounded perspectives on how others are responding to this critical issue, how you can begin your own conversations, and resources that will support you in carrying out your personal plans. The hourglass sands of time are running out. Now is the time to create the ending you want for the final chapter of your life story.


Frances Shani Parker, Author
Becoming Dead Right: A Hospice Volunteer in Urban Nursing Homes is available in paperback and e-book editions in America and other countries at online and offline booksellers.