“In sickness and in health”
is said lovingly at many weddings before the journey of marriage begins. Many
couples living longer and taking care of spouses are living to be quite old
while experiencing their own healthcare challenges. Caregiving a dying spouse
for a lengthy period is a possibility for many who commit to fulfilling
marriage vows. Because most caregiving
research focuses on younger adults, it’s very important that the needs of the older
generations are addressed.
This research on older adult caregivers included 17 interviews from participants aged 80 or over. Results
indicated that they demonstrated high levels of resilience and adapted well to
their caregiving roles. They accepted this as part of the marriage contract
they made years ago. While they appreciated support from family and friends, their
own needs for care were not always recognized by health and social care
services organizations. Their illnesses and end-of-life challenges needed more
positive interventions from healthcare professionals.
Lee and Tom McNally fell in
love 13 years ago. Tom is a hospice patient now receiving chemotherapy. He
informed the hospice chaplain that he and his girlfriend Lee wanted to get
married. They both say they take the marriage vow of “in sickness and in
health” very seriously.
Frances Shani Parker, Author
Becoming Dead Right: A Hospice Volunteer in Urban Nursing
Homes is available in paperback and e-book editions in America
and other countries at online and offline booksellers.
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