Grandparent Journey: Older Adult Seniors

 Nana, Emory, Amelia, and PawPaw

Back in September 2012, grandparenthood was a fantasy that my friends Lonnetta and Harold "Mitch" White could only anticipate with longing. They were older adults who looked forward to discovering all the excitement that other grandparents experienced. Finally, they received word about the upcoming event that would change their lives forever. They were so happy when I interviewed them. This post describes their special grandparent journey from anticipation to gratification.

Grandparents' Anticipation 

Lonnetta
I have/had feelings of extreme happiness, joy and excitement!
My thoughts were fantasies of how wonderful it is going to be to love and spoil a grandchild the way I was loved and spoiled by my paternal grandmother.

Mitch
I remembered the anticipated arrival of my son. Of course, in those days we didn’t know if we were having a girl or boy. The imaging technology simply hadn’t gotten that far. But I was near the delivery room and had the privilege of seeing my first grandchild when she emerged from the delivery room. What a wonderful opportunity!

Becoming Nana and PawPaw

Amelia, First Grandchild

We felt proud and on top of the world. We were pleased that Amelia was finally here, healthy and absolutely gorgeous! We wanted to do all that we can to help her to be the best at whatever it is she wants to be. All of American history has its challenges. Amelia came to us at a time when inequities are in full force, but she is fortunate to come from a family of modest economic means. She has a powerful enclave of parents and grandparents to help her in her development.

Emory, Second Grandchild

Just when we thought that there could be nothing better than having one granddaughter, we were blessed with Emory. Emory's parents, Angie and Pops (Mitch, II) told us of the probable arrival of a new child in June 2015 while we were helping Miss Amelia celebrate her third birthday. Meeting Emory for the first time was very different from meeting Amelia when she was just minutes old. Emory was born in anther state. We waited a few weeks before traveling to their home to meet her. The miracle was just as breathtaking and the bonding just as emotional and meaningful. Once again, we felt on top of the world about her good health and beauty. We committed ourselves to supporting her in fulfilling her life purpose. 

                                                   

                                        Emory and Amelia
 

Grandparents' Reflections and Concerns

What a difference a few years have made. We are grandparents to two beautiful sisters. They are full of energy, love, curiosity, creativity, originality, confidence, and let’s not forget competition and independence. Both are entertaining and precious! Roles have developed and changed in many ways. Amelia genuinely enjoys being the big sister. Emory is a fearless competitor and mimic determined to establish and secure her position as Queen of the Hill. 

The realities of grandparenting vary daily. The most important thing grandparents can provide for character building is presence. This presence is notable in our grandchildren's development of a strong sense of self-awareness, self-confidence, and self-esteem. We are concerned that they stay healthy, that they have qualified, supportive educators, that they are exposed to diverse populations, have pride in who they are, and that they practice humane leadership skills. We also want them to know that negative stereotypes about older adults and others are not true. 

We hope to shelter our grandchildren from the harsh realities of the world while we expose them to opportunities to build character. With the presence of COVID-19, they have had to learn difficult lessons about life. They have had their world tossed upside down with school closings, virtual learning, and separations from family and friends. They have had to adjust to hand washing, mask wearing, social distancing, and other safety practices on a regular basis. Fortunately, they have been spared coping with the deaths of close family members and friends.

Regarding racism, Amelia and Emory know they are different. They have a black father, a white mother, and three black grandparents. From news reports, they know that racism can cause brutal and deadly results. As grandparents, we will continue to help provide them with the tools and support necessary for them to understand and overcome the realities of racism and improve society.

Regardless of the need, we are ready, willing and all too eager to answer any questions, kiss all “owwies,” read every book, relieve any fear, visit any playground, cinema, zoo, museum, or ice cream shop, make any purchases that will bring a smile and pleasure to the most deserving grandchildren in the world. In short, we will do whatever we can to make our granddaughters happy, as happy as they make us.

You can read more about this grandparent journey at this blog post:

"Older Adult. First-Time Grandparents: Interview With Frances Shani Parker (Baby Video)"

Frances Shani Parker, Author
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