Dementia, Alzheimer’s Holiday Support for Caregivers (Video 1:57)

The holidays are approaching fast. Caregivers with loved ones who have dementia may have serious concerns. They may dread the upcoming love-hate festivities they have grown to expect during this busy time of year. How can they make this time more enjoyable? What about travel, rest, meal and gift preparations? They can really use some help.

Support is available from healthcare providers and others who can empower them during these joyous and sometimes stressful weeks of planning and celebration. In this video, Eve Moses, an educator with the Alzheimer’s Association, offers practical suggestions that can assist caregivers in making holidays more enjoyable for themselves and their loved ones.

Frances Shani Parker, Author

Becoming Dead Right: A Hospice Volunteer in Urban Nursing Homes is available in paperback and e-book editions in America and other countries at online and offline booksellers.

Hospice and Nursing Homes Blog

Grandchildren Discuss Dementia, Alzheimer’s (Video 6:30)

So often, we hear views of adults regarding their parents with dementia. But what is dementia like through the eyes of grandchildren? Imagine their emotions when their loved ones forget their names and can’t remember the relationships they have. What about the hurt feelings these young people experience when agitated grandparents with dementia strike out at them verbally or physically, and they’ve done nothing they know of to cause this?

Dementia must be explained to children in age-appropriate ways that support them in their adjustments to dementia of grandparents and others. Listening to these young people’s concerns and encouraging them to express them are important. Family discussions can be helpful for everyone.

Parents should be aware of changes in grandchildren’s behaviors at home and school. These young people need reassurances that they are not the cause of grandparents’ mood swings, that they are still loved by grandparents who have an illness that sometimes interferes with the expression of that love. Children should be reminded of the many good times in the past that they shared with their grandparents.

In this video, young people express their feelings about how their grandparents’ dementia has impacted their lives.

For more intergenerational information about dementia, you can view this post featuring children learning about dementia through school partnerships.

Frances Shani Parker, Author

Becoming Dead Right: A Hospice Volunteer in Urban Nursing Homes is available in paperback and e-book editions in America and other countries at booksellers such as Amazon and Barnes and Noble .

Hospice and Nursing Homes Blog

Caregiver and Alzheimer’s Disease Holiday Support (Video 1:57)

November brings thoughts of holiday celebrations with family and friends. For caregivers of loved ones with Alzheimer’s disease, festive thoughts of socializing can seem overwhelming. They may dread the upcoming gatherings expected during this busy time of year. These are some questions caregivers of  loved ones with Alzheimer’s disease may be considering:

1)   What’s the best time of day to celebrate?

2)   Will family and friends be understanding of caregiver needs and needs of loved ones with Alzheimer’s?

3)   What strategies can be used to relieve stress?

4)   How can loved ones with Alzheimer’s be involved as active participants?

5)   What would be good gifts for caregivers and loved ones with Alzheimer’s to receive?

This Alzheimer’s Association video is titled Caregiving Through the Holidays. Narrated by Eve Moses, an educator with the Alzheimer’s Association, it offers practical suggestions that can assist in making happy holiday memories.

Frances Shani Parker, Author

Becoming Dead Right: A Hospice Volunteer in Urban Nursing Homes is available in paperback at many booksellers in America and other countries and in e-book form at Amazon and Barnes and Noble booksellers.

Hospice and Nursing Homes Blog

Mother's Day Tribute to Mother Who Died From Alzheimer’s Disease (Video 5:07)

This post is dedicated to mothers everywhere, especially those who are living with or who have died from a terminal illness. The accompanying video is by raindancer808 from New Orleans, Louisiana. She honored her mother before she died with this Mother’s Day tribute that her mother never saw. She wrote:

“My Mom is in end stage Alzheimer's, and I wanted to do something special for her on Mother's Day.”

Honoring a Nun Who Has Alzheimer's Dementia

You can also read my tribute to a nun who positively impacted my life as a child and later developed and died from Alzheimer’s disease here:

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/honoring-nun-who-has-alzheimers-frances-shani-parker?trk=mp-reader-card

Frances Shani Parker, Author

Becoming Dead Right: A Hospice Volunteer in Urban Nursing Homes is available in paperback at many booksellers and in e-book form at Amazon and Barnes and Noble booksellers.

Hospice and Nursing Homes Blog

Hispanic, Mexican American Male Caregivers (Research, Alzheimer’s Video 2:48)

According to the National Alliance for Caregiving, in collaboration with AARP, more than 65 million people, 29% of America’s population, are caregivers for the chronically ill, disabled, or aged family members or friends. A family caregiver is usually a woman. Typically, she is 49 years old and caring for her widowed 69-year-old mother who does not live with her. She is married and employed. More than 37% have children or grandchildren under 18 years old living with them.

With these statistics, it’s little wonder we seldom hear about male caregivers, but they are out there with stories that need to be told. This post focuses on Hispanic, Mexican American male caregivers, particularly those taking care of parents. In a federally-funded study of 110 Mexican Americans who were caregivers in lieu of a female relative, the following results were reported:

1)   Caregiving strain and burden in Mexican American males may have more to do with physical and emotional costs than financial ones.

2)   Mexican American males providing personal care for their mothers adopt a matter-of-fact approach as they act "against taboo."

3)   This caregiving approach is a new way to fulfill family obligations

Ric Gomez quit his job and became a caregiver for his father who has Alzheimer’s disease. In this video interview with KPBS reporter Amita Sharma, Ric shares the triumphs and challenges of his caregiving experience.

Frances Shani Parker, Author

Becoming Dead Right: A Hospice Volunteer in Urban Nursing Homes is available in paperback at many booksellers and in e-book form at Amazon and Barnes and Noble booksellers.

Hospice and Nursing Homes Blog

Holiday Help: Caregivers and Relatives with Dementia, Alzheimer’s Disease (Video 1:57 mins.)

The holidays are approaching fast. You’re a caregiver of a relative with dementia. You dread the upcoming love-hate festivities you have grown to expect during this busy time of year. You can really use some help.

According to University of South Carolina research involving caregivers of relatives with Alzheimer’s disease, the leading cause of dementia, there are three themes that may be prominent during your holiday season:

1) Becoming aware of your relative's symptoms

2) Trying to have one last normal holiday

3) Deciding how to handle holidays when your relative lives in an assisted living facility

Support is available from healthcare providers and others who can empower you during these joyous and sometimes stressful weeks of planning and celebration. In this video titled "Through the Holidays," Eve Moses, an educator with the Alzheimer’s Association, offers practical suggestions that can assist you in making happy holiday memories.

Frances Shani Parker, Author
"Becoming Dead Right: A Hospice Volunteer in Urban Nursing Homes”
“Hospice and Nursing Homes Blog”

Dementia (Alzheimer’s) Caregiving with Understanding and Patience (Video 5:31 mins.)

Dementia refers to a group of conditions that gradually destroy brain cells and lead to mental decline. Many conditions can cause dementia, but Alzheimer’s disease is the leading cause. According to the Alzheimer’s Association, this disease, which advances at different rates, destroys memory and the ability to learn, reason, make judgments, communicate, and perform daily activities. Patients may also experience changes in behavior and personality such as anxiety and delusions.

Dementia is like a fluttering bee. As a hospice volunteer in nursing homes, I never knew when it would make honey or sting. There were times when residents with dementia were rude or violent. I have seen one slap a CNA’s (certified nursing assistant) face with such force I thought the CNA would fall over. To her credit, she took a deep breath and walked away while another CNA intervened.

Residents with dementia enjoyed talking about the past and embellishing their stories. Sometimes they remembered detailed incidents from childhood and minutes later couldn’t remember where they were. They needed encouragement when they became afraid. I tried to analyze what caused certain behaviors. Distractions helped them change their thoughts. Just like everyone else, they felt respected when their opinions mattered. I let them make some decisions, usually limiting the choices to two, so they wouldn’t feel overwhelmed.

Caregivers and other loved ones of those with dementia have to remind themselves often that patients’ repetitious questions and other unintentional behaviors are manifestations of the disease. This video titled “What is that?” reminds them (and all of us) to dig deeply into wells of themselves for understanding and patience.

Frances Shani Parker, Author

Becoming Dead Right: A Hospice Volunteer in Urban Nursing Homes is available in paperback and e-book editions in America and other countries at online and offline booksellers.

Hospice and Nursing Homes Blog

Delaying Dementia with Bilingual Ability

Can you speak more than one language? If you can, you may have a better chance at delaying the onset of dementia symptoms. Dementia refers to a group of conditions that gradually destroy brain cells and lead to mental decline. Many conditions can cause dementia, but Alzheimer’s disease is the leading cause. Most people who have the disease are over sixty-five, with eighty being the average age of diagnosis.

Toronto researchers say that fluency in two or more languages may be able to stave off cognitive decline because of the mental agility required to juggle them in day-to-day life. Principal investigator Ellen Bialystok, an associate scientist at the Rotman Research Institute of the Baycrest Center for Geriatric Care, states, "How you learn the language probably doesn't make much difference; how good your grammar is probably doesn't matter. What matters is that you have to manage two complete language systems at once."

Among the unilingual people studied, dementia began to appear in men at an average age of 70.8 and in women at 71.9. Among those who knew two or more languages, dementia did not begin to appear in men until an average age of 76.1 and in women until 75.1.

You can read more about this research in this “Toronto Globe and Mail” news article.

Frances Shani Parker, Author
"Becoming Dead Right: A Hospice Volunteer in Urban Nursing Homes”
“Hospice and Nursing Homes Blog”

An Alzheimer’s Disease Support Group for Caregivers (Video 1:48 mins.)

My first encounter with unofficial hospice volunteering took place many years ago when HIV/AIDS was viewed as an early death sentence. I remember my patient saying, “But when I’m with my support group, they don’t care how I look. They can see past the ugliness of my outside. It’s like I’m fighting a war with other people like me on my side. We tell each other any information we know that will make our lives better. Even when it looks like I’m losing the war, they give me hope for the future. I give them hope, too.”

I knew that no amount of reading would ever make me know his pain and suffering. The support group was where he garnered much of his strength and improved self-esteem for dealing with the disease. Many people have a need to share their challenges with someone who has experienced what they are going through. That’s why I have great respect for well-run support groups. Caregivers often need respite time away from patients, so they can share their experiences, gain information from others, and relieve stress.

Frances Cooper is 87 years old. After years of caring for her husband, who had Alzheimer’s (Alz-high-merz) disease, she has accumulated a wealth of advice that can benefit others. She leads a support group that helps caregivers learn strategies for coping with the disease of their loved ones. For example, when her husband insisted that he wanted to go home (meaning the home where he was raised), she simply drove him around the block and returned to the house where they currently lived. This simple solution satisfied him. She also speaks about having her husband sort eating utensils, an activity that some patients with dementia find enjoyable.

You can view a brief clip of Frances Cooper’s Alzheimer’s disease support group for caregivers. Frances Cooper’s caregiver stories have been a source of inspiration and support for many.

If you are a caregiver who would like to share your written caregiver story with others or read stories by other caregivers, visit the Care2tell.com website.

Frances Shani Parker, Author
"Becoming Dead Right: A Hospice Volunteer in Urban Nursing Homes”
“Hospice and Nursing Homes Blog”