Long-Living Older Adults: Health and Retirement Research, Video 4:46

Louisiana Hines, America’s oldest African American at age 113, died this year.

If you’re an aging boomer or older, you may have started thinking about your bucket list and your mortality in general. For example, if you buy certain long-term items like beds and appliances, you may think about buying those that will “take you on out.” For some of you, that future time will be much longer than you anticipate. You could belong to a group of older adults who are the exceptionally long-lived. Who are these people living in their late 90's and beyond?

According to research on older Americans, the exceptionally long-lived have these characteristics:

      1) They are relatively healthy and high functioning for most of their lives.

      2) They experience health declines only upon reaching maximum longevity.

      3) Although many individuals reach maximum longevity in a state of poor health and functioning,

  exceptional survivors remain healthy and high-functioning even in very old age.

Is 90 really the new 70? With more and more people living in their 90's, it’s one of the fastest growing age groups. This video introduces you to older adults being photographed and interviewed. Having a ball with life while living in their 90’s, they think getting old is just a state of mind.

Frances Shani Parker, Author

Becoming Dead Right: A Hospice Volunteer in Urban Nursing Homes is available in paperback and e-book editions in America and other countries at online and offline booksellers.

Hospice and Nursing Homes Blog

Holiday End-of-Life Conversations: Five Questions

Take advantage of this holiday time together to engage in important end-of-life conversations. They can be crucial later in honoring wishes of those we love and ourselves. After all, it’s a great opportunity to have more family members involved.

Engage With Grace is a movement aimed at promoting these kinds of conversations using the five questions below. They’re not easy questions, but they are important and shouldn’t be ignored. Sometimes we think we know what our loved ones want, but we really don’t. Later in life, when several people are involved in making inevitable decisions about threatening health matters, guessing, confusion, and hurt feelings can easily hinder progress. Some negative feelings may remain long after the deceased loved one has died. The key to preventing these kinds of interactions is having end-of-life conversations when they can be positive, including personal opinions regarding loved ones' wishes. Fortunately, many people actually enjoy discussing their answers with loved ones.

Add new meaning to your holidays by including thoughtful conversations that can improve quality of life. No one knows what the circumstances could be at future family gatherings or during a healthcare crisis. Some who are present this year may not be present next year. Everyone can benefit greatly from answering these questions and implementing the suggestions given. The Caring Connections website has information to help with your plans. (Click on the questions below to make them larger):

Frances Shani Parker, Author

Becoming Dead Right: A Hospice Volunteer in Urban Nursing Homes is available in paperback and e-book editions in America and other countries at online and offline booksellers.

Hospice and Nursing Homes Blog

Dementia, Alzheimer’s Holiday Support for Caregivers (Video 1:57)

The holidays are approaching fast. Caregivers with loved ones who have dementia may have serious concerns. They may dread the upcoming love-hate festivities they have grown to expect during this busy time of year. How can they make this time more enjoyable? What about travel, rest, meal and gift preparations? They can really use some help.

Support is available from healthcare providers and others who can empower them during these joyous and sometimes stressful weeks of planning and celebration. In this video, Eve Moses, an educator with the Alzheimer’s Association, offers practical suggestions that can assist caregivers in making holidays more enjoyable for themselves and their loved ones.

Frances Shani Parker, Author

Becoming Dead Right: A Hospice Volunteer in Urban Nursing Homes is available in paperback and e-book editions in America and other countries at online and offline booksellers.

Hospice and Nursing Homes Blog

Hospice Volunteer Training: Steps to Volunteer Success

1)   Remember why you serve.

There’s a reason you feel compelled to enhance lives of the terminally ill. Cherish that inspiration. Move forward committed to an amazing and rewarding healthcare adventure.

2)   Believe it’s all win-win.

Providing end-of-life service is a privilege, not a calling to be a savior. You and those you support come together in relationships of mutual healing and growth. Honor your win-win journey.

3)   Be present.

By all means, show up. But be present with patients after you arrive. Evaluate appearances, behaviors, surroundings, and interactions with others. Listen with your heart. Even silence speaks. Really try to understand living from their perspectives. Focus on advocacy for improving their quality of life.

4)   Try other doors.

Patients will have challenges such as dementia that may not respond to your usual front-door communication. Try other doors and even windows. Obstacles are enrichment opportunities in your partnerships with patients. Touch, music, pictures, stories, and fantasies are a few entry points. Let patients help you navigate your way into their world.

5)   Know your piece in the puzzle.

Adherence to rules of protocol and professional ethics should be routine. Be aware of boundaries such as confidentiality regarding yourself, your patients, and their loved ones. Follow guidelines of your hospice organization, and seek help when needed.

6)   Untie your knots.

There may be times of doubt, confusion, sadness, and guilt. These are normal knots of the caregiving process. Untie them by seeking support for your total well-being. Maintain proper rest, nutrition, exercise, and balance in your life. Do your best. Don’t be surprised when you discover reasons to kiss yourself.

7)   Spread the word.

Be knowledgeable about hospice and palliative care. Share information so others can benefit from these specialized areas of healthcare. Encourage involvement in hospice and palliative care career and service activities.

8)   Pick up a turtle.

If you see a turtle sitting on a fence post, you know somebody helped to put it there. Be on the lookout for turtles aiming for fence posts. Be a role model for other volunteers. Participate in organizations, conferences, workshops, and discussion groups where you can share best practices while learning new ideas.

   

9)   Write death sentences.

Death will come no matter how often you avoid it or wrestle it to the ground. Have your advance directives, finances, and property in legal order. Urge others to do the same. Don’t burden loved ones later with important decisions you can record now. As you unfasten yourself from this life, be satisfied knowing your death sentences will be carried out according to your wishes.

  

10)  Expect rainbow smiles.

Rainbow smiles hug you so tightly you can feel ribs of joy press against your essence. Hospice volunteering provides ongoing moments for you to positively impact lives. When you make those connections happen, rainbow smiles will come.

© Frances Shani Parker

You can read about my personal journey in becoming a hospice volunteer without realizing I was one here: https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/hospice-volunteer-me-frances-shani-parker?trk=mp-author-card

Frances Shani Parker, Author

Becoming Dead Right: A Hospice Volunteer in Urban Nursing Homes is available in paperback and e-book editions in America and other countries at online and offline booksellers.

Hospice and Nursing Homes Blog

Lichtenberg Rating Scale Protects Older Adult Finances (Research, Embezzlement Video 1:53)

One out of every 20 older adults in America will be a victim of financial exploitation this year. They will come from varied social positions, geographic locations, occupations, races, and nationalities. You or someone you know could be a victim. You may also know the perpetrator of the crime. Perpetrators of embezzlement, which is theft or misappropriation of funds placed in one's trust, are often relatives and friends you know and trust.

This heart wrenching topic brings to mind an important question that should be considered: What can others do to assist older adults in making good decisions for protection against financial abuse? With our quickly aging population, financial exploitation of vulnerable older adults has become a profitable and easy way for many to make money. Horror stories about stolen identities, looted bank accounts, and transferred property ownership abound. The devastation left behind is sometimes insurmountable.

Is there a way to protect older adults from this travesty while still allowing them their dignity during the process? Dr. Peter Lichtenberg, Director of the Institute of Gerontology at Wayne State University in Detroit, MI, is creating the Lichtenberg Financial Decision-Making Rating Scale for just that purpose. This assessment will determine whether older adults are at risk for being victims of financial abuse and their ability to manage their money and other assets.  He hopes to be able to pilot the 61-question assessment by the end of the year. The assessment and a more general 10-question screening exam would be used by professionals who work with older adults such as attorneys, law enforcement officials, and people who work at financial institutions. They would be in positions to determine whether those surveyed are experiencing undue outside influence and whether they are competent in making good financial decisions. With this knowledge, they can better protect those most at risk for being exploited.

Last Will and Embezzlement is a groundbreaking documentary film that is on national tour. Produced by Pamela Glasner, whose brother was victimized by embezzlement, the movie raises awareness about financial exploitation of older adults. The movie stars Hollywood icon Mickey Rooney sharing his firsthand account of being victimized. The following movie trailer gives a brief summary of the documentary and the magnitude of this problem.

You can read more about financial abuse and the trust factor in what experts refer to as the crime of the 21st century here.


Frances Shani Parker, Author

Becoming Dead Right: A Hospice Volunteer in Urban Nursing Homes is available in paperback and e-book editions in America and other countries at online and offline booksellers.

Hospice and Nursing Homes Blog