Older Adult Senior Online Dating: Ageism, Sexism, Scams (Research, Video 4:35)

Contrary to what some people still believe, many older adults are using the Internet to enhance their lives in ways they never dreamed about “back in the day.” In fact, many of them have considered or actually used the Internet as a convenient place to search for love on numerous websites with a specific focus on meeting their matchmaking needs.

What are some of these online dating websites adding to the old traditions of choosing romantic partners? This older adult online dating research study that examines the visual representations of people on 39 dating sites offers this information:

1) Ageism and sexism were very evident in the presentation of older adults. The majority of men and women were smiling and had a fair complexion, light eye color and perceived ages younger than 60. Older women were presented as younger and wore more cosmetics.

2) The social regulation of sexuality was emphasized with only heterosexual couples being presented.

Conclusion: This ageism and sexism display a narrow representation of older adults in society and imply that older love, intimacy, and sexual activity are for older adults who are "forever young."

Older women are at a disadvantage when it comes to online dating if they seek partners only in their age groups. Not only are there fewer men alive in their age group, many of the living ones want younger women. If you think this makes women desperate to marry whatever they can get, you don't know jack about older women. While they may still be open to the possibility of marriage, many women cherish their lifestyles free of various responsibilities.

Unfortunately, there is one aspect of online dating that everyone should be cautioned about in order to proceed safely. Both sexes can be victimized by online dating scams. The Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI) received more than 15,000 reports linked to romance scams last year. More than half of the complaints involved losses of money, sometimes in massive amounts. The victims are often older Americans trying to get back in the dating pool. This video shares important information including the story of one of the victims who lost roughly $300,000.

Frances Shani Parker, Author
Becoming Dead Right: A Hospice Volunteer in Urban Nursing Homes is available in paperback and e-book editions in America and other countries at online and offline booksellers.
Hospice and Nursing Homes Blog

The Power of Thank You (Gratitude Research, Video 3:27)

Thank you. We often say these words when we are moved by the virtue of others extending positive impressions to us. Thank you. We enjoy receiving these words disguised as grateful hugs that hold us so tightly we feel ribs of joy press against our essence. Psychologists call our declarations of gratitude "other-praising emotions" that build bridges connecting us to people and experiences that promote good feelings. As thankful people praising our benefactors, we create something glorious and special together, something akin to a soul-smacking kiss.

While it may seem obvious that gratitude has powerful feel-good benefits, considerable scientific research on gratitude also confirms, not only the goodness generated by our expressions of appreciation, but also our benefactors' fond sentiments regarding our shared response. Studies also report that an attitude of gratitude can improve our health. When people were asked to write five things for which they were grateful during a week, improvements in their well-being were evident in test results. These are some of the benefits illustrating the power of thank you:

1.    Better health

2.    Sounder sleep

3.    More satisfaction with life

4.    Kinder behavior

An added research bonus reports that the more we show appreciation for our blessings, the more blessings we receive. In this video, New York Times science columnist John Tierney joins "CBS This Morning" to discuss more health benefits of giving thanks and various ways to cultivate gratitude in our lives. Thank you!

Frances Shani Parker, Author

Becoming Dead Right: A Hospice Volunteer in Urban Nursing Homes is available in paperback and e-book editions in America and other countries at online and offline booksellers.
Hospice and Nursing Homes Blog

End-of-Life Holiday Love Story (Video 1:59)

Dying from ovarian cancer a few years ago, Brenda Schmitz had a lot on her mind. A wife and mother of four young boys, she envisioned leaving her family and a few others something very special that would enhance their lives and memories of her love for them in a most surprising manner. Her idea focused on a letter including her final wishes, a letter that was not like any most people normally write or receive. Brenda’s written expressions were to be delivered after she died. Specific instructions indicated the letter could not be sent until something very special took place. Did I mention the letter was sent to a radio station?

Happy holidays to you all. Experience the real meaning of the season in “I Love You Whoever You Are,” Brenda’s heartwarming story about her unique end-of-life wishes.

Frances Shani Parker, Author

Becoming Dead Right: A Hospice Volunteer in Urban Nursing Homes is available in paperback and e-book editions in America and other countries at online and offline booksellers.

Hospice and Nursing Homes Blog